Product Review: Clear Men Scalp Therapy

Have you ever killed a man? According to Ed O’Neil in “Wayne’s World,” “If you stab a man in the dead of winter, steam will rise up from the wounds. Indians believed it was his soul escaping from his body.” Whether you have or not, you’ll need something to get all that dried blood and gunk out of your hair afterwards.

Even if you aren’t sophisticated, you don’t have to smell that way too. So what if you are a single guy and a bag of knock-off Fruit Loops (Tootie Fruities) is all you’ve had for dinner the last two evenings, sans milk? Or if your house is absolutely littered with so many toys and pink clothes it looks like a five-year-old girl exploded? Or that, for some reason, an empty can of chicken you ate for dinner on Monday is still idling on the stovetop, less than three feet from the trash can?

The key is that no one needs to know the real you — they just have to be familiar with the nicely dressed, good smelling dude that appears when you exit the threshold of your house and show up for work.

That’s where the new Clear Men Scalp Therapy can aid your quest for a dandruff-free life, and add a certain level of sophistication you may be lacking. It’s a 2-in-1 anti-dandruff shampoo and conditioner that smells marvelous.

In fact, it smelled so good that when I first used it that I didn’t bother reading the packaging with important hints about what this product is or what it does; I just applied it to my body like a body wash. As I was using it I thought, “Does this make me cheap to use a shampoo as a body wash?” Little did I know that I was doing the exact inverse of that. And the answer is yes, I am cheap. I’m so cheap, I thought the website Groupon.com was an adult swingers site for two years and was even more aroused when I found out it helped me save money.

CMST contains 10 nutrients and botanical extracts including ginseng, tea tree and natural mint. Even if you knew nothing about extracts, you could tell just something was different about the shampoo because of the way it made you feel. Instead of feeling bogged down, or accumulating a soapy residue, I had a refreshing, energizing experience.

Not that it made any difference on the condition of my living room, kitchen or bathroom. Thanks to the Clear Men’s Scalp Therapy, I’m convinced the bathroom is the cleanest area of my house.

On this day, I didn’t kill a man. But I killed the shell of a boy masquerading as one. With a knife, just like Ray Lewis, and we both got away with it.

Want to make your scalp come to life? Check out the CMST Facebook page.

  

You can follow us on Twitter and Facebook for content updates. Also, sign up for our email list for weekly updates and check us out on Google+ as well.

The Light from the TV Shows: Failed Pilots with All-Star Casts

As the new TV season rolls out, let’s take a look back at a few series that never actually made it on the air. Not that there aren’t plenty such series every single year, but sometimes you look back and wonder, “How could a show with all of these talented people not get on the schedule?” Not that we have an answer to that question, you understand, but at least we can all be mystified and annoyed together.

Next! (2001)

Starring: Bob Odenkirk, Fred Armisen, Zach Galifianakis, Brian Posehn, Nick Swardson
What you missed out on: After Bob Odenkirk and David Cross decided to put a bullet in their HBO sketch comedy series, “Mr. Show” (that’s right, it was their decision, not the network’s), the guys attempted to go their separate ways, with Odenkirk setting up shop at Fox with a pilot for a new sketch comedy series. If you think the above names are impressive, consider that several other “Mr. Show” alumni were in tow as well, including Jerry Minor, Jay Johnston, and Jill Talley, with Patton Oswalt also participating in some capacity or other. And, yes, if you’re wondering, Cross made an appearance in the pilot, too. So what happened? Apparently, Fox basically flipped a coin to decide which new sketch comedy series they’d add to their lineup, and “Cedric the Entertainer Presents” won the toss. Oh, what might’ve been…

North Hollywood (2001)

Starring: Jason Segel, Amy Poehler, Kevin Hart, and Judge Reinhold as himself
What you missed out on: Judd Apatow has never been ashamed to admit that the only reason that this pilot ever came into existence is that Fox refused to let him cast Jason Segel as his lead in the short-lived but highly-regarded “Undeclared,” but you can’t say he didn’t do his best to surround Segel with top-notch talent. Segel, Amy Poehler, and Kevin Hart played roommates, with Segel a struggling actor, Hart a struggling actor/comedian, and Poehler serving as Judge Reinhold’s personal assistant. There’s a more detailed look at the pilot here, but the long and the short of it is that, although Apatow admits that he really didn’t know if there was a decent series to be had in “North Hollywood,” he thinks the pilot’s pretty decent, but its tone didn’t match the sitcoms filling ABC’s lineup at the time, so they took a pass on it.

Saddle Rash (2002)


Starring: H. Jon Benjamin, Sarah Silverman, Todd Barry, Mitch Hedberg
What you missed out on: Created by Loren Bouchard, best known to animation fans as one of the creative forces behind “Home Movies,” “Saddle Rash” seemed to have all the elements necessary for a successful Adult Swim series, so why didn’t it make it beyond the pilot stage? Was it that westerns weren’t exactly in vogue at the time? Was there some sort of stigma attached to the project because they brought in country artists to continued voice work (including Waylon Jennings as a very special guest in the pilot)? Whatever the case, the pilot got aired – no doubt mostly because Adult Swim has a tendency to air just about every pilot it orders, whether it actually ends up going to series or not – but that was the end of the trail for the series.

Read the rest of this entry »

  

Related Posts