Have you ever killed a man? According to Ed O’Neil in “Wayne’s World,” “If you stab a man in the dead of winter, steam will rise up from the wounds. Indians believed it was his soul escaping from his body.” Whether you have or not, you’ll need something to get all that dried blood and gunk out of your hair afterwards.
Even if you aren’t sophisticated, you don’t have to smell that way too. So what if you are a single guy and a bag of knock-off Fruit Loops (Tootie Fruities) is all you’ve had for dinner the last two evenings, sans milk? Or if your house is absolutely littered with so many toys and pink clothes it looks like a five-year-old girl exploded? Or that, for some reason, an empty can of chicken you ate for dinner on Monday is still idling on the stovetop, less than three feet from the trash can?
The key is that no one needs to know the real you — they just have to be familiar with the nicely dressed, good smelling dude that appears when you exit the threshold of your house and show up for work.
That’s where the new Clear Men Scalp Therapy can aid your quest for a dandruff-free life, and add a certain level of sophistication you may be lacking. It’s a 2-in-1 anti-dandruff shampoo and conditioner that smells marvelous.
In fact, it smelled so good that when I first used it that I didn’t bother reading the packaging with important hints about what this product is or what it does; I just applied it to my body like a body wash. As I was using it I thought, “Does this make me cheap to use a shampoo as a body wash?” Little did I know that I was doing the exact inverse of that. And the answer is yes, I am cheap. I’m so cheap, I thought the website Groupon.com was an adult swingers site for two years and was even more aroused when I found out it helped me save money.
CMST contains 10 nutrients and botanical extracts including ginseng, tea tree and natural mint. Even if you knew nothing about extracts, you could tell just something was different about the shampoo because of the way it made you feel. Instead of feeling bogged down, or accumulating a soapy residue, I had a refreshing, energizing experience.
Not that it made any difference on the condition of my living room, kitchen or bathroom. Thanks to the Clear Men’s Scalp Therapy, I’m convinced the bathroom is the cleanest area of my house.
On this day, I didn’t kill a man. But I killed the shell of a boy masquerading as one. With a knife, just like Ray Lewis, and we both got away with it.
Want to make your scalp come to life? Check out the CMST Facebook page.