Learn to rip throats and pound Cunth just like MacGruber

Only one American hero has earned the rank of Green Beret, Navy SEAL and Army Ranger. Just one operative has been awarded 16 Purple Hearts, 3 Congressional Medals of Honor, and 7 Presidential Medals of Bravery. And only one guy is man enough to still sport a mullet. On May 21, Will Forte brings his clueless soldier of fortune to the big screen in the action comedy, “MacGruber.” I had a chance to see an early screening of the movie at this year’s SXSW film festival, and although I wasn’t as crazy about it as many of the other critics and bloggers in attendance, it’s one of the funniest “Saturday Night Live” films to date.

It’s certainly going to be an uphill battle for “MacGruber” this summer as it competes against surefire blockbusters like “Iron Man 2” and “Robin Hood,” so Universal hasn’t wasted any time in getting the word out with everything from a Mullet Generator app to guest appearances by the cast on “WWE Raw.” And now you can prepare for the film’s release with the all-new MacGruber Training Academy, a collection of games that teaches you everything you need to know about pounding Cunth, ripping throats, and defusing bombs. Complete a challenge and you’ll earn yourself an exclusive desktop wallpaper, although at the time of writing this, the actual downloading process wasn’t working correctly. What can you say? It’s classic MacGruber.

  

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Champion’s Double Dry t-shirts and shorts

Champion t-shirt

Spring is here and summer is around the corner, so it’s time to get outside and get active. Put down the computer, shut off the video game and get your tail out in the fresh air with a basketball, a Frisbee or whatever else gets you moving around.

Champion sent us some of their new Double Dry gear to try out, and we were very impressed. You can see a photo of the t-shirt above, and it feels just as comfortable as it looks.

The t-shirt has sleek, ergonomic seams that provide a more streamlined fit. They’re triple-stitched for strength and flat-locked for non-chafe softness. Believe us – they are extremely comfortable and allow for a flexible range of motion. The shorts also provide a maximum ease of movement along with good ventilation, and you can adjust the inner drawcord for a flexible, custom fit.

Finally, you look great in this stuff.

  

Win a trip to Brazil from Liquor.com

Looking to plan a summer vacation but don’t know where to go? Let Liquor.com take care of all the details, like spending six exciting days drinking your way across Brazil, starting with a visit to Distillery Maison Leblon in Minas Gerais. To get you in the mood, check out our Brazilian Bikinis gallery.

You’ll see how Brazil’s national spirit, Cachaça, is produced, from the cutting and pressing of sugarcane to the distilling and bottling. The trip would not be complete without a visit to Rio de Janeiro where the lucky winner and a guest will get to drink tasty Caipirinhas on the sands of Ipanema, Copacabana, and Leblon Beach.

Click here for the details to enter the giveaway which ends on June 30, 2010.

  

2010 Ultra Music Festival – World’s largest electronic music festival hit Miami for the 12th year

As the colossal stage loomed ahead, I knew that Host Damien Pintos’ Facebook claim of world’s largest techno stage wasn’t a pitch line, but almost an understatement. It loomed over 200 feet skyward and 1000 feet wide in the late afternoon Miami sunshine, an immense structure of lighting, speakers, projection screens and contraptions that I’ve never seen the likes of. The event was a remarkable feat unto itself – the 18th annual Ultra Music Festival hosted here in Miami, Florida.

This remarkable showcase took place from March 26-27, bringing together the world finest DJs and musicians in the electronic music field, and 2 sold-out days proved its success and global importance. My lovely Czech model assistant Zuzanna wrote about all of this to my Facebook in-box months ago, as she was coming to the USA from Prague to ‘perform’ in LA and wanted my help for her to attend. I was more than happy to parade her about and was most glad she brought this all to my attention.

Part of the tail end of the Miami Winter Music Conference, Ultra offers a massive showcase of top global electronic music live acts and DJs, with superstar like the Black Eyed Peas, The Cure, The Killers and more hosting the main stage in years past. This year a more old-school flavor was represented on the marque: The Crystal Method, Global sensation Teisto and overwhelming Ultra music festival hero Dead Mau5 bringing their collection of the sickest grooves and fattest beats to the Miami Bicentennial park once again.

Friday’s show was remarkable and not the least of which were the sounds. With a wild 14 full time stages operating over a diverse collection of fields, tents, band shells and temporary trailer stages, there was an unlimited about of beats and grooves to enjoy. House, trance, big-beat, acid jazz, dubstep, electropop and more were there for you to match your own mood with your own groove. Wandering about the rolling fields of Bicentennial Park along the shore of Biscayne Bay, you were sure to find what ever you might want, need or desire, music or otherwise! On the omnipresent main stage, Carl Cox, house trance legend from the UK, got the 50,000+ in attendance really going with a remarkable mix of beats, then David Guetta took the stage for hugely popular tracks, including of his recent global hist: Sexy Bitch (aka:Sexy Chick) and One Love. It certainly didn’t hurt when Black Eye Pea front man Will.i.am joined him as sidekick, putting the packed general admission crowd into a frenzy. The Crystal Method, the duo team from the USA, cut major tracks as the day grew into night, bringing new mix interpretations to their hugely popular tracks, such as the ethereal Busy Child. Closing out the night was Tiesto and the unbelievable stage show took on a even more unreal spectacle.

Every known stage special effect was used to it maximum capacity here, and for thrilling results. 8 syncopated fire cannons shooting flames 40 feet high into air?..check. Massive banks of argon lasers shooting off of the main stage onto Miami skyline buildings…yup. Computerized Video projection screens surrounding the main stage portal, 40 feet wide 200 feet high on all 3 sides?… fo sho. Fog blasting cannons the width of the stage looking like the titanic at full steam?… sure. Confetti explosions over the crowd creating a 5 minute myler shower of 1000 feet wide…oh yea. Explosions not unlike concussion bombs…natch. Inflatable stage props ala Pink Floyd, rising 50 feet high..done. Cheery pickers for the performers…yes sir. Fireworks shooting off hundreds of feet into…and , well you get the idea…you could be legally deaf and enjoy the visuals alone for a lifetime! Kudos must go out to the production technical staff who put on the largest, most technically and visually elaborate outdoor concert experience ever created in the history of the city of Miami, or the entire state of that matter. Without the restrictions and confines of say the local NFL Dolphin (Landshark) Stadium, the creative stage production crew had near free reign to present a visual blast unlike any other. It also helps when the over 100,000 in attendance pays over $125 per day, you can do the math and realize no expense was spared for this show. The sound mixes were as superb as well, and not only from the main stage but from the others, creating grooves and beats so fat that they almost took on a 3rd dimension of their own.

Several things are to note about this remarkable gathering. First and foremost was its “modern day” Woodstock-like experience for all, with much positive energy and vibes throughout. Scantily clad girls skipping about in micro shorts, fish nets and bright trippy colors made things festive to say the least……. practically zero aggression was to be seen. The virtual complete lack of a police presence within the actual festival, maintained a harmonious environment that fostered good will and love. These Ultra fans are not the kind that bring bad vibes, logic goes, so let them be and we’ll just hang way on the perimeters. This was mellow gathering, and the chill-out areas created within, such as the spacy Sonic Forestgave a nice trippy alternative to the norm. This year, as in the past, 2 VIP areas were set up to give a somewhat more civilized approach to the fest, with hammocks, couches and quick service bars set up on grassy knolls looking over the main stage field. My only complaint was the woeful lack of rest rooms in some areas, leading to frightful lines for what seemed like hours!

Saturday brought the biggest crowds and ever better weather! Global sensation and genre founder Paul Olkenfold dug deep for some amazing sounds, but as per usual, Deep Trace and House phenomenon Deadmua5 closed the show with arguably the fatest, sickest beats ever to hit Miami, all to a visually mind blowing light and sensory stage experience. Damian Pinto hosted the 2 day event as per usual, keeping the crowd on the main stage at their maximum party potential, and presenting these amazing acts together with the energy that only the most experience host can do. Damien Pinto once again set the stage for the world best electronic music showcase. Kudos!

  

Guilty Pleasure – The new KFC “Double Down” sandwich

kfc double down sandwich

The new “Double Down” sandwich from KFC is getting quite a bit of buzz, so we had to try it out. You’re certainly not thinking about your waistline when eating it, so it better deliver on taste! In that area we were very impressed – it’s juicy, greasy and delicious! We’re guessing it will become a late-night favorite for the beer-drinking crowd (which includes most Bullz-Eye readers).

The “sandwich” boasts 540 calories, 32 grams of fat and 1,380 milligrams of sodium! It’s really not much of a sandwich as it doesn’t have any bread. Instead you have 2 slabs of fried (or grilled) chicken with bacon, cheese and more in between. Fortune calls it the “Colonel Punishment” while acknowledging it has created a media sensation. Jimmy Fallon recently featured it on his show.

It’s only available for a limited time, but we’re guessing this one will become a regular item. We can’t remember the last time a so called sandwich had so many people either offended or excited to dig in or stay away!

  

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