Picture of the Day: Michelle looks in the mirror

Here’s an awesome shot of the beautiful Michelle looking in the mirror as she’s sitting in her pretty white underwear.

Michelle looks in the mirror

  

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The Light from the TV Shows: TGS: 30 Great Shows (That Don’t Actually Exist)

With “30 Rock” departing the airwaves after a not-unrespectable seven seasons – a particularly incredible achievement when you consider what an incredibly off-the-wall, insider-y sort of sitcom it was throughout its run – it seemed only appropriate to offer up some sort of tribute to the show in this week’s column. Unfortunately, since everyone else seems to have swiped all of the good angles that are 100% show-specific (indeed, I actually wrote a piece on the 30 best “30 Rock” guest stars for the “Today” blog, The Clicker), I had to think a little bit outside the box, but since a key aspect of the series was its show within a show, “TGS with Tracy Jordan,” it seemed like a perfectly reasonable concept to spotlight 30 of TV’s great fictional TV series. Lord knows these aren’t all of them, of course. Hell, even limiting myself to a one-fake-TV-series-per-real-TV-series rule…with the only exception being “30 Rock,” which seemed only fair, given the reason for the list in the first place…there are still thousands of omissions, so feel free to offer up your personal favorites that didn’t make the cut, “Family Guy” fans. (There’ve been so many on that show, I didn’t even know where to start.)

1. TGS with Tracy Jordan (“30 Rock”)

For those who can remember back to the pilot of “30 Rock,” Liz Lemon (Tina Fey) was originally in charge of a not-terribly-great sketch comedy series called “The Girlie Show,” but when GE’s new Head of East Coast Television and Microwave Oven Programming, Jack Donaghy made an executive decision to add the completely unpredictable Tracy Jordan (Tracy Morgan) to the show, the comedian’s ego necessitated a change in the show’s title to feature his name more prominently. 136 episodes later, we’ve scarcely seen a single “TGS” sketch in its entirety, and what bits we have seen have rarely been funny (at least not intentionally), but the shenanigans surrounding the series have been consistently hysterical.

2. The Alan Brady Show (“The Dick Van Dyke Show”)

Dick Van Dyke has discussed on many occasions how many TV writers have come up to him over the years and told him that the biggest reasons they decided to break into the business in the first place was because Rob Petrie and his cronies on Alan Brady’s variety show made it look like one of the most entertaining occupations in the world. Strangely, he hasn’t spoken nearly as much about how many of those writers finished their comments by yelling, “Thanks for nothing, you big liar!” I’m betting it’s about 50/50.

By the way, although “The Alan Brady Show” wasn’t real, the folks at MeTV talked Carl Reiner into doing a promo for the addition of “The Dick Van Dyke Show” to their line-up where he reprised the character. Funny stuff.

3. Invitation to Love (“Twin Peaks”)

If you’re not a David Lynch obsessive, you may not remember this soap opera, but those with keen eyes will recall that it turned up at least once in each of the first seven episodes of “Twin Peaks.” It’s also worth noting that “Invitation to Love” pointedly features identical-twin characters played by the same actress, which – in no way coincidentally – was more or less what Sheryl Lee did as Laura Palmer and Maddy Ferguson.

4. The Adventures of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy (“Spongebob Squarepants”)

The best bit about this cartoon-with-a-cartoon was the fact that the “Spongebob” show runners reunited former “McHale’s Navy” co-stars Ernest Borgnine and Tim Conway to prove the characters’ respective voices. It doesn’t get much cooler than that.

5. The Terrence and Phillip Show (“South Park”)

Disproving a longstanding theory that Canadians can’t be funny while cementing the not-really-in-question suspicion that farts are always funny, it need only be said that Terrence and Phillip are a stone-cold gas. Sadly, this clip is from their movie, “Asses of Fire,” rather than their series, but it’s basically the same thing. Y’know, except filthier. Much, much filthier.

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Picture of the Day: Vicki unbuttoned

Vicki is so sexy in this photo.

Vicki unbuttoned

  

A New Year of Dating in 2013: Dress The Part

There was a time when first dates often meant sweaty palms and plenty of nervousness. Not only did people agonize about where to go and how much to cram into a date, they also wondered about making a first impression with what to wear.

Over time, the concept of dating has changed. Where face-to-face interaction when meeting was the way to plan a first date, a lot of times first dates are planned in front of a computer. There is a chance you have exchanged pictures, but a lot of the planning is done with messages back and forth.

Most dating websites have downplayed the art of dressing up. Instead, dressing down, or casual, has become normal. If your first date happens to be a sporting event, then you won’t want to wear a suit or a dress to the occasion. Meeting for a drink or a meal? Now there is where you want to make the impression.

Here are some ways for both men and women to impress the opposite sex and increase the chances of a love connection:

1. Dress the part

Men, if you are taking a date to a restaurant that isn’t swanky yet is impressive, then you won’t likely need the suit-and-tie route. A nice shirt and a pair of dress pants or khakis will do the trick. More formal first dates for men are when you bring out the Brooks Brothers men’s suits so you can look your best and show your sharp dressing style. For women, a nice blouse and pants will work out for less-formal occasions. Dinner at a very nice restaurant involves breaking out the evening dress, or maybe you go the three-piece suit route if you are in a corporate job. With a little transformation, a daytime suit can easily become a nighttime outfit.

2. Accessorize

For the men, a nice watch or a small necklace looks good on an outfit. Make sure it goes well with what you are wearing at dinner. An extravagant watch may look out of place on a mid-priced outfit and may draw attention away from you. For women the rules are the same. Don’t overdress with plenty of jewelry. Wear something simple around the neck and ears and maybe one or two rings on your hand.

3. Finish the Look

Not only does this involve proper hygiene, with fingers and exposed skin washed and cleaned thoroughly, it involves what you wear to complete the outfit. Men should wear comfortable socks with shoes. Make sure the socks and shoes aren’t too tight. There’s no use gazing at your first date while you wonder about blisters at the end of the night. Women should wear appropriate heels with their outfit. Don’t wear spike heels with a conservative dress, for example. Make sure the look completes itself. And yes, ladies, it is acceptable again to wear hosiery with an outfit. If you do, match the look of the hose to the outfit and its accessories (purse, etc.). They always say one color makes you look better, if not slimmer.

4. A Little Too Much Fragrance?

Be sensitive to your date’s needs. This means don’t splash on too much cologne or perfume. A little fragrance dabbed on certain areas of the body goes a long way toward impressing the opposite sex. A lot of fragrance can trigger sensitive noses at a table, not to mention other tables might notice.

5. A Fresh Ending

This is not so much a dressing tip but a tip about how to end the night. This falls under accessories. Have a mint or something fresh ready that you can sneak into a purse or pocket. Breath spray works just as well. This will help you in the event the first date ends in a kiss or you feel the need to share a smooch during the night’s activity.

  

Justified 4.04: The Bird Has Flown

SPOILER WARNING: This post will appear following a new episode of Justified. It is intended to be read after seeing the show’s latest installment as a source of recap and analysis. As such, all aspects of the series up to and including the episode discussed are fair game.

Justified has always walked the fine line between serial and episodic storytelling. There are times when a full episode that doesn’t add to the season’s overarching plot can seem like filler, no matter how much awesome dialogue there is. But some of the show’s best episodes have come in a “crime of the week” package. How could you forget season one’s “Long in the Tooth,” in which guest star Alan Ruck played a cartel accountant turned dentist for the downtrodden? Justified’s fourth season has continued to walk the tightrope between those two formats.

In the two episodes prior to this week’s installment, the more serialized Waldo Truth mystery featured prominently while Raylan’s various episodic(ish) comings and goings made their presence known but, for the most part, blended into the background. The reverse was true in the premiere as well as “The Bird Has Flown,” in which a situation that’s been developing in bits and pieces over the last three weeks—the Raylan-Lindsey-Randall love triangle—was finally given center stage.

“The Bird Has Flown” is thematically linked by the ideas of choices and consequences, cause and effect. First of all, there’s the question at the center of every love triangle: which one will she choose? Until last week’s closing scene, it seemed pretty clear Lindsey wanted nothing to do with her ex-con ex-husband. Or it did up until Raylan returned home to find his place ransacked, anyway. After that things seemed just as clear: we (and Raylan) had only been led to believe Lindsey was interested in Raylan because it was part of her and Randall’s scam. But when we returned this week, all clarity had gone from the situation. You could say Lindsey made a series of choices throughout the episode as her loyalties wavered back and forth between Raylan and Randall. You could also say that all that wavering wasn’t a series of choices but her failure to make just one. Either way, you’d be right.

As it turned out, nobody—including Lindsey—knew who she would choose until Rachel’s beanbag shotgun entered the equation. She shoots Raylan once, to Randall’s delight, only to turn to her ex and unload once, twice, and after being greeted by an empty click on the third pull, she decides to turn the gun into a melee weapon. The answer was just as murky as the question. Lindsey didn’t pick A) Raylan or B) Randall, but C) none of the above (or perhaps D) me, myself, and I). Nonetheless, when she tells Raylan where the money is—although she’s actually referring to what they bought with the money—he smiles and says “I knew you liked me.” And when Randall asks how many times Lindsey shot him, Raylan replies, “a couple more times than she shot me.” That’s Raylan for you, no woman could ever dislike him, Lindsey was just too smart to risk the legal consequences of being around when he came to.

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