Product Review: Old Spice Re-Fresh Body Spray

smellcome-to-manhood-Old-Spice

Ever since I saw the first Old Spice “Mom Song” video, I have been praying to my non-denominational Spray God every night, asking (begging) that one of the smell technicians at Old Spice reach out to me for a product review of their new Re-Fresh Body Spray. In the meantime, I used an old bottle of Fiji shower gel to feel like I was part of the movement, to show I was “down,” i.e. the way gang members have to “do dirt” to be accepted into a particular gang or sect. And it paid off.

Old Spice reached out, but just like in gang life, they wanted something from me.  Even though I killed that drifter (needlessly, as it turned out) to peg my “real-a-meter” into the red, what they really needed from me was to recruit more members who cover their members in body spray. After all, 67% of guys who use body spray aren’t using it correctly.

I blame AXE for the cavalier spray techniques that have been developed, because after those ads, you thought the only way to apply body spray was via Spray Cloud. I seriously didn’t think “too much” existed in the body spray vernacular.

If AXE isn’t to blame, perhaps it is the lesser known GED equivalent, Bod and the famous song/tagline conveyed via sex drenched female voice, “Hot bod/I want your bod.” And who could forget that dude’s ripped abdominals? Here, check ‘em out:

Oh my Bod, that’s terrible.

Whoever you want to blame, it doesn’t change the fact that an Overspraying Epidemic exists thanks to the lack of proper training regarding spray techniques and men’s body sprays.

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Denver Broncos All-Pro Wes Welker talks Old Spice, Stingers and NOT Peyton Manning or Tom Brady

Wes-Welker-Old-Spice

Wes Welker is a player that any fan can relate to, which is what makes him such a great pitch-man for Old Spice and the new “Unnecessary Freshness” campaign. But when you look at Welker’s career and laundry list of  accomplishments, it becomes apparent that you are looking at the body of work befitting a future NFL Hall of Famer.

Two Super Bowl appearances as a cog in the most productive offense in NFL history. Five Pro Bowls. League leader in receptions three times.  Most seasons with 100+ receptions in NFL history (5). Most receptions in Patriots history.

Welker even holds the Dolphins’ all-time records for total kickoff returns, kickoff return yardage and total punt returns. Only one player in NFL history, Gale Sayers, had more all-purpose yards in his first three NFL seasons than Welker did with the Dolphins. Legendary NFL head coach Marty Schottenheimer has called cutting Welker from the Chargers in 2004 “the biggest mistake (he) ever made.”

I spoke to Wes about his career and his experience working with Old Spice.

Wes, how the hell are you?

Good, good everything is great.

Right off the bat, I’m not going to ask you any questions about comparing Tom Brady and Peyton Manning, okay?

Okay, (laughing) sounds great man. I’ve had so many of those lately it’s almost normal.

First, I’d like to address a rumor that I heard. Kim Kardashian and Kayne West recently had a baby and named it North West. I actually heard that they named it after you, Wes Welker, because you run north and south predominantly and of course, your name is Wes. Is that true?

That is the first I have ever heard of that. So, I think you have to go to them on that one, but that would be pretty interesting.

They’re pretty well insulated so I’m just going to take your word for it.

Yeah, you can, feel free. Who knows?

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Bullz-Eye Interviews Dikembe Mutombo

According to Mayan prophecy, the world is set to expire on December 21, 2012. With only 4 1/2 weeks (and counting) to the end of the world, Old Spice has recruited arguably the best defender of all-time – NBA legend and global ambassador Dikembe Mutombo – to save the planet from its impending peril!

In a new digital campaign launched last week promoting its Champion scent, “Dikembe Mutombo’s 4 1/2 Weeks to Save the World” is a real-time, embeddable digital video game where Mutombo will embark on weekly globe-saving missions based on current news happening and events (featured in the narrative and gameplay) that could be considered signs that the Apocalypse is coming.

Bullz-Eye: Tell us about the game. According to the site you have 4 1/2 weeks to save the world before the end of the Mayan calendar, correct?

Dikembe Mutombo: I team up with Old Spice to promote the computer game and we have to save the world in 4 1/2 weeks. Also to promote Champion scent from Old Spice. It’s a wonderful game for everybody to play.

Bullz-Eye: The concept is you’re going to defeat your rivals and save the world. Is there any way you could save everyone on Earth except for my ex-wife?

DM: (Laughing) We have to save the entire world. We’re going to save the world because the Mayan calendar says it will end in four and a half weeks. And we’re going to do our best to stay alive.

BE: If you could just reject her head to like the 10th row, I’d really appreciate it. Just like you’re blocking Shaq.

DM: (Laughing) You’re funny man. It’s like blocking a shot and if I could, I’d send it all the way to the 10th row, no problem.

BE: Let’s talk about Georgetown. You played there with Alonzo Mourning and a lot of other great players. Why couldn’t you and Zo win a national title?

DM: Man, that is a major question that will haunt us for the rest of our lives. We had a chance and ultimately went to the NBA to become dominant centers and we had opportunities to win in college. The opportunity was there, and we just didn’t do it.

BE: This may not be a basketball question, but it’s become an internet meme, and we’ve got to ask you about “Who wants to sex Mutombo?” story.

DM: That story is not true. I don’t know who came up with that story. Nobody ever said who was there at the party with me, who was out with me. First of all, when I came to Georgetown, I didn’t know English. So why would my mind come across like that? Plus, playing for Coach Thompson, one of the most disciplined coaches in college, he was very strict and knew where we were every night. Somebody asked me about it once and I said it was a made-up story. When you’re awesome, beautiful, tall, whatever, people will try to make up stories about you.

BE: How did the finger wave come to be your signature move?

DM: It happened after my 3rd year, just before we beat the Seattle Supersonics in the 1994 NBA playoffs. I was having such a great year and blocking shots and I was moving up in the league. I used to block the shot and then I would shake my hand and no one said nothing. One day, I decided shaking the hand doesn’t really mean nothing, maybe the best way not to come into the House of Mutombo is to wave my finger, so it worked out very cool. But it ended up getting me a lot of technicals.

BE: How did the NBA come to ban that? Did Does David Stern call you personally?

DM: It came from the players. You would hear from someone like Phil Jackson or something, that maybe you better stop what you’re doing it’s costing a lot of money. It was good for me to do in the players face, but if I could face the fans and wave my finger away from the players face, it would be great. That’s why you see in the last 5 years you can see I started doing it away from the players face. So I don’t have to lose a couple of thousand dollars.

BE: Was there anybody you loved to do it to where it was worth losing a couple thousand bucks?

DM: There were a lot of players who did it to me. Yes, a few players who had a chance to dunk on me. Like Michael Jordan in the playoffs, he had a big dunk and waved his finger at me. But he got a technical foul.

BE: Who was your favorite NBA player to block?

DM: That’s a good question. To me, not just one particular player. But I think playing against Shawn Kemp… he was such a high jumping, athletic player.

BE: Skinny 200 pound Shawn Kemp? Or fat 300 pound Shawn Kemp?

DM: (Laughing) Come on man! I don’t know what new Shawn Kemp looks like now, because I haven’t seen him in a while, but old Shawn Kemp!

BE: How gratifying was it to be the first eight-seed to beat a one-seed when your Nuggets beat Kemp’s Sonics in 1994?

DM: One of my proudest successes of my career. But I’m happy to promote the Old Spice game now. I want everyone to go to the website and play the game to save the world. We only have four and a half weeks, so we better do it.

Play the game “Dikembe Mutombo’s 4 1/2 Weeks to Save the World” and buy Old Spice Champion Scent here.

Old Spice’s fans and casual video gamers will also play a major role in helping save the universe. All points earned and submitted over the duration of the 4 1/2-week game will power a wood carver engineered to draw additional rings on the Mayan Calendar.

  

Bullz-Eye Interviews Packers Pro Bowl Wide Receiver Greg Jennings

Watching the latest commercials for Old Spice’s new Champion line of antiperspirant, body spray and body wash, it’s pretty easy to tell Greg Jennings has a great sense of humor. The Super Bowl champion and two time Pro Bowl selection (2010, 2011) didn’t disappoint when we discussed petting a grown man like a dog, his hate for Bears fans and who has better balls: Brett Favre or Aaron Rodgers.

Was it weird to pet a grown man like a dog?

Oh man it was real weird. It was spooky because it looked so realistic; it’s unbelievable, the process.

What’s the deal with Old Spice and how did you guys team up?

It’s all about the new Champion Scent and I was just working with Old Spice and the new ad campaign. There is more to come, but the first ad, me with my dog, just letting everybody know that if you believe in your “smelf”, anything can be possible. Your “smelf” is all about “smelf confidence” and making sure you can overcome anything getting the viewer and the fan to realize you can overcome any type of adverse situation if you use this Champion Scent from Old Spice.

So that was your dog in the ad?

That wasn’t technically wasn’t like, “my dog”, but it definitely was “my dog”.

Seemed like there was a connection there some good chemistry like you and Aaron Rodgers.

Absolutely — “You did it Roscoe!”

Aaron Rodgers seems like a very low key guy who is easy to get along with- is that true? Does it make the relationship easier and more productive?

Absolutely. Any time you can have a guy that is as down to earth and easy going as he is it makes the relationship and what we do together on the field, and off the field, that much easier. When you can relate with someone on and off the field, it makes the work environment that much easier.

You’ve caught passes from obviously Aaron Rodgers and earlier in your career Brett Favre- who throws the ball harder?

I always have to tip my hat to Aaron simply because he is younger; I was with Brett in his latter stages. He has storied about guys with broken fingers on his resume, but when I was here definitely Aaron.

Who throws the more catchable ball? And what makes a ball more catchable?

They both throw the most catchable balls. And that said, NO Homo. But they both have balls that…I don’t even like to talk about it. They both throw a really good uh… (laughing) balls.

How bad do you personally hate Bears fans?

Uhhh, pretty bad.

When you get into games and say you’re playing a non-divisional rival, are you more motivated or are you always at the same level whether it’s a team like the Bears or not?

Um, pretty much it’s a different intensity overall of the game, the atmosphere. When you’re playing a team like the Bears or a division rival. Vikings even, Lions even. It’s just a different intensity. But when you’re out there competing it really doesn’t matter as an individual you go out there w the mindset that you gotta beat your opponent every single snap. That’s my mindset and as far as the Bears are concerned I shouldn’t really hate them, I should love them- they’ve always been so gracious to us (laughing). I had to get that in there.

Growing up in Michigan were you a Lions fan?

I was, I was. I hesitate to say I was a Lions fan because I was more of a Barry Sanders fan. I hated the Lions; but I loved Barry Sanders. I rooted for them because of him. But it was tough man. It’s great to see them having success now just because I’ve grown up watching them my entire life, but I don’t want them to have too much success, but, you know how that goes.

How different would your life be if John Skelton was your QB?

Uhh — a lot different. It would be a ton different.

Listen to the full interview here.

For more information on the new Old Spice Champion Collection, check out the website here.

  

Product Review: Old Spice Champion Collection

Sometimes, “smelf-confidence” can be misplaced. Maybe it’s that booger you have hanging out of your nose that you’re unaware of, your wife that’s overly “friendly” to your homies on game day, or just that funk that emanates from your body that you’ve gotten so used to you don’t even notice anymore.

While Old Spice can’t help you with your incompetence, or your slutty wife, it can help you with your scent. The Old Spice Champion collection has an Offensive Odor game plan that breaks down as follows:

Old Spice Champion Body Wash Gel Douche

It’s first and 10 and you’ve got a long way to go to get clean, AKA to the end zone. Strip down like John Travolta at an all-male bath house and hit the showers with your bottle of Old Spice Champion Body Wash Gel Douche in your, ahem, hand. Before you apply it to your body, take a whiff and notice the effective, yet not overly apparent scent. What does it smell like, you ask? I’d say it’s similar to the Original Scent of the Original Old Spice, yet toned down a few notches, like John Travolta when he’s out with his wife. Lather up — we’ve got a drive to “consummate” here.

Old Spice Champion Body Spray

It’s second and six after a solid gain on first down thanks to the effectiveness of the Old Spice Champion Body Wash Gel Douche. Now that you’re out of the shower, let the all-out assault of the Old Spice Champion Body Spray on your body begin. Apply it liberally, like Obama wants to apply his healthcare bill. Cover your body in it and you’ll notice quickly that has a refreshing scent like you’d expect from any Old Spice product, but it also has the refreshing tingle and scent of Original Scent crossbred with baby powder. You may say, “Oh, Paul, baby powder, what’s the deal man? I’m a man, man!” Yes you are, but your lady isn’t. She’s the one, after all, nuzzling your body with her ample bosom, so let’s keep her bosom happy. Game, set, you.

Old Spice Champion Anti-Perspirant & Deodorant

It’s third and one. You’re moving the ball down the field in an efficient manner, but efficiency doesn’t sell, sex does. So slather on the sex, AKA Old Spice Champion Anti-Perspirant & Deodorant, and assault the opposing team’s (or any lady of your choosing) front line! “Believe In Your Smelf” and fire that pigskin over them mountains — go deep! Thanks to the scent of the Old Spice Champion Deodorant, you’ll already have the requisite confidence to cock your arm behind your head, exposing your great smelling armpit, and find your #1 wide out Greg Jennings running a fly pattern to an easy TD!

The Old Spice Champion Gold Collection is available in somewhat limited edition via the website here, or at any reputable store in your area.

  

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