10 Greatest Comments Appearing Below Rolling Stone’s “Steve Perry vs. Sarah Silverman” Article

If you haven’t seen the article in question yet, you can find it right here, but to get the gist, here’s the opening paragraph:

In an interview with Playboy set to hit newsstands tomorrow, comedian Sarah Silverman responds to questions about her provocative brand of humor by telling a story about how “the onetime lead singer of a very popular band from the 1980s” came up to her after a show and said, “You’re my favorite comedian. You have the best nigger jokes.” Silverman didn’t outright name Journey’s Steve Perry, but she added, “I’ll just say this: After that, I stopped believin’,” a poke at the band’s classic “Don’t Stop Believin’.”

It’s kind of a non-event, really, since the combination of knowing Sarah Silverman’s sense of humor and reading Steve Perry’s reaction to her comments make it seem pretty likely that she’s having a laugh by taking an approximation of something he said and making it into a punchline of questionable comedic value (your mileage, of course, may vary), but try telling that to the members of the Steve Perry street team, who have come out in force in the Comments section of the article.

Here, then, are ten of my favorite reactions…and, yes, they are all 100% real.

1. “I refuse to believe that Mr. Perry is the same type of low-life as John Mayer who would carelessly use such a disgusting word.”

2. “What bullshit! I don’t believe he even talked to that slut puppy! Neal (Schon) and (Jonathan) Cain probably paid her to say that because they know Perry’s working on his new cd! What a bunch of lowlifes!”

3. “WELL I DON’T BELIEVE A WORD THAT TRAILER TRASH SARAH SAYS. I’D LIKE FOR HER TO USE THE NI WORD IN FRONT OF WHOOPI. WHY DIDN’T SHE USE IT WHEN SHE WAS ON THE VIEW? STEVE’S IDOL IS SAM COOKE HELLO IF HE WAS PREJUDICE HE WOULDN’T SAY SAM COOKE IS HIS HERO MORE LESS. WHY COMEDIANS FEEL THEY HAVE USE BAD WORDS TO GET LAUGHS IS BEYOND ME. SHE COULD OF SAID BLK PEOPLE INSTEAD OF THE N WORD GROW UP SARAH.”

4. “I work in the mental health field and so I know how people perceive what they want and misconstrue to make themselves powerful. I find her humor cheap, condescending and pathetic. Steve Perry can’t even enjoy a comedian act without someone trying to shit on his image. LEAVE HIM ALONE! I get so tired of people triangulating in the name of fame at other’s expense.”

5. “First and foremost, I do not think that Racial and Ethnic slurs have a place in Comedy PERIOD. My interpretation of Silverman is nothing more than a Skank! Furthermore, I also have been a fan of Steve Perry for 30 years or more. I HAVE been to concerts and he is a total gentleman at all times, with more class than any other Lead Singer I have ever seen. I also wish to challenge what RS is saying that Mr. Perry actually said to defend himself. I doubt he would say as much as RS is saying, or go into detail about the experience. This is just disgusting rubbish that belongs in the dump along with Sarah Silverman. Listen to Steve’s beautiful Voice and weigh the talent. I don’t have to tell you which side the scale is going to weigh heavy. RS, write something good for a change. You used do some great articles. This is definitely way below your standards.”

6. “This is SUCH BULL!! Steven is one of the kindest, most gentle spirits on the planet and would NEVER say the “N-word”!!!! That bitch lied!”

7. “Steve is very classy and SEXY guy! I don’t believe he said this in a million years! Steve is friends with Randy Jackson, so why would anyone agree with that so called comedian?”

8. “SARAH SILVERMAN , I WILL NEVER WATCH U ON T.V AGAIN..THIS IS SO-UNCOOL”TO USE JENNIFER ANNISTON’S WORDS”.. STEVE PERRY IS WAY TO POPULAR FOR U TO JAM ON..AND REALLY U JUST AREN’T THAT FUNNY..TO BE HONEST, EVEN IF ROBIN WILLIAMS OR RICHARD PRYOR SAID IT , I WOULD BE PISSED..AND U CAN’T EVEN TOUCH THEM AS A COMEDIAN.”

9. “First Sarah is a total B. Get a life! I guess your name hasn’t come up often so you have to create a total lie about “The Voice.” Like one comment said he was going to come out with an album and now this will scare him away. He’ll hide for another ten years!! Thank you!!Some people (Sarah) have nothing better to do in their lives than make up lies about the nicest people! All she does is make up horrible jokes but they shouldn’t be called jokes because they SUCK ASS!!! Anyways she’s racist herself. Yeah it’s fun and jokes but what do we really now? She just might hate us all! Also Steve Perry is the greatest voice ever! That is why they call him the voice! And his idol is Sam Cook! for heaven sakes he’s black! Now why would a guy who loves Sam Cook be racist!?!? And maybe Neal Schon paid her to say it all. I can believe that after all Neal and Steve aren’t great friends right now. Sarah is just making this up. She thinks it’s a funny and cute joke. Well let me tell you something it’s not funny or freaking cute!! Also why would someone falsely accuse another just for a laugh!! She’s an F*** Bitch!!!Lastly Sarah get a freaking life!! Stop making fun of people just because. Steve I believe you all the way! You’re the best singer and also will be. And you’ll also be the nicest and most charming guy ever!! And again I believe you!! Steve Perry is right and Sarah Bitch is wrong to Hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

10. “I believe Steve Perry over that no-talent-horse-faced-unfunny woman any day…and where is all the outcry over John Mayers racial slurs in Playboy??? The kid is a no-talent racist who will be dead of a drug or alcohol overdose in 5 years or less… Peace…”

  

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Drink of the Week: La Paloma (Revisited)

La Paloma.This Thursday is Cinco de Mayo, and that’s as good an excuse as any to revisit what I’m guessing is the world’s second most popular tequila cocktail. Indeed, this year I’ve got an additional excuse, which is to give a plug to some work by a DOTW Manor resident and frequent cocktail tester. Seems this enterprising young director was a finalist in a contest being sponsored by one of your classier tequila manufacturers, Avion. Moreover, I found out not long after writing the original draft of this post that he actually won a Grand Prize. Good things can sometimes come to those who imbibe (with moderation) and work (to excess).

As luck would have it, I myself can be seen in one of Joseph Lao’s two spine-tingling faux trailers, this one demonstrating the construction of a high-end La Paloma. Moreover, the last time we dealt with that drink — some four years ago and, it seems, a lifetime away — I offered the more popular, but arguably less refined, take on the beverage. This time, we’re setting aside the Jarritos grapefruit soda, and very definitely the Squirt, and going for a somewhat healthier and arguably more satisfying version of a cocktail that deserves its place alongside many better-known drinks.

La Paloma

2 ounces white tequila (Avion Silver, if you’ve got it, I guess)
1 ounce fresh grapefruit juice
1/2 ounce fresh lime juice
1/2 ounce simple syrup or about 2 1/2 teaspoons of superfine sugar
1 splash or two of club soda
1 lime web (desirable garnish)

This is one you build in a Tom Collins-type glass, though it might be good idea to pre-chill it as well in this case. Anyhow, just add all the liquid ingredients over ice and stir, and then add the lime wedge, which really does seem to improve the overall flavor.

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Coming Soon: A Moviegoer’s Guide to February

february

2016 got off to a pretty dire start last month, but thankfully, Hollywood has put together one hell of an apology with what is quickly shaping up to be the most promising February in a very long time – if ever. Though there are still a few duds littered throughout the month (here’s looking at you, “Gods of Egypt”), there are also some really exciting new releases, including the long-awaited Deadpool movie and the latest from directors Joel and Ethan Coen and John Hillcoat.

“Hail, Caesar!”

Who: Josh Brolin, George Clooney, Ralph Fiennes and Scarlett Johansson
What: A Hollywood fixer in the 1950s works to keep the studio’s stars in line.
When: February 5th
Why: It’s been awhile since the Coen brothers made a straight-up comedy, instead focusing on more dramatic fare like “Inside Llewyn Davis” and “True Grit,” but the writing/directing duo appears to be back to their screwball best with this period piece set during the latter years of Hollywood’s Golden Age. Though the Coens’ goofier films have always been hit-and-miss (for every “Raising Arizona,” there’s an “Intolerable Cruelty”), the footage released thus far has been pretty encouraging, particularly an extended clip with Ralph Fiennes and Alden Ehrenreich squabbling over a line of dialogue that perfectly encapsulates the farcical tone of the movie.

“Pride and Prejudice and Zombies”

Who: Lily James, Sam Riley, Bella Heathcote, Lena Headey and Charles Dance
What: Jane Austen’s classic tale of tangled relationships between lovers from different social classes in 19th century England is faced with a new challenge: an army of undead.
When: February 5th
Why: How do you make “Pride and Prejudice” exciting? Add zombies. That was the secret sauce in Seth Grahame-Smith’s bestselling mashup novel, which transformed the literary classic into a blood-stained horror comedy. But that was seven years ago, so it’ll be interesting to see whether anyone still cares now that it’s finally being adapted for the big screen. After all, the last Grahame-Smith novel to receive the Hollywood treatment, 2012’s “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter,” was a massive flop, and although “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” has a cleverer concept, it’s just as one-note, which doesn’t bode well for its audience, whoever that’s supposed to be.

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Drink of the Week: The Twelve-Mile Limit

the Twelve-Mile Limit.During the first few years of prohibition, seafaring bootleggers attempting to import contraband booze into the U.S. could rely on a three-mile limit…the point beyond which American legal jurisdiction ended and alcohol became legal. In an effort to make the logistics of illegal import more challenging, a 1924 law extended the limit to a full 12 miles. Presumably, the new law made things harder both on rum-runners and legitimate cruise lines and their thirsty passengers.

As recounted in the 21st century by Ted Haigh in his uber-influential “Vintage Spirits and Forgotten Cocktails,” globetrotting journalist Tommy Millard therefore took it upon himself to up the ante on a previously existing Three Mile Limit cocktail (aka the Three Miler). Milard was apparently quite the gadabout and man about whatever town he happened to be in who, as one fellow journo put it, moved about like “a leaf on the wind.”

Today, I celebrate the fact that, after losing my first copy of Ted Haigh’s book to a water-filled sink, another copy has arrived at my doorstop with this potent, but actually quite tasty beverage. Even today, it’s probably best consumed when the authorities are well out of reach.

The Twelve-Mile Limit

1 ounce white rum
1/2 ounce rye whiskey
1/2 ounce brandy
1/2 ounce grenadine
1/2 ounce lemon juice
1 lemon twist (garnish)

Combine all of the non-garnish ingredients in a cocktail shaker with plenty of ice. (I like to start to with the grenadine, to make sure all of the thick syrup finds it’s way from the measuring jigger to the drink.) Shake vigorously, and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Add the lemon twist and salute your freedom to be the highly responsible boozer you are.

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When it comes to brands, different writers seem to have strong preferences for what works best in a Twelve-Mile limit. Mr. Haigh suggests that Appleton White Rum and Hennessy VS brandy are his favorites for this drink. Writing in 2010, rum blogger Matt Robold thought a bolder rum was in order and offered El Dorado 3 Year Old or Montanya Platino. The following year, blogger Doug Ford used Mount Gay Eclipse Silver rum, Sazerac rye, and Courvoisier VSOP brandy.

I used what I had in the house. My first version included Bacardi Maestro de Ron, 100 proof Rittenhouse Rye, and my default Reynal Brandy. That come out a bit tart for my taste. I had more fun with the next, version where I went with the slightly less potent Bulleit Rye and Meyer’s Light Rum, producing a much more pleasantly mellow libation. A less high end version featuring plain old regular light Bacardi and Old Overholt rye was simple, but nicely balanced between sweet, tart, and boozy flavors.

One more note. Despite what you might read on some blogs, making your own grenadine is a great thing to do if you’re itching to go all DIY, but it’s in no way a necessity. I just try to make sure I’m using something with at least some real pomegranate juice in. Right now, I’m using Sonoma Syrup, but my usual default, Master of Mixes, would very likely have been about as good. For some reason, the online prices I’m seeing for the latter are MUCH higher that what I remember paying for it at my local BevMo! Nevertheless, avoid the all-artificial super cheapy stuff, if you can.

And now a moment of silence on behalf of long deceased journalists and other leaves on the wind.

  

Is Gerrard an MLS misfit?

When Steven Gerrard signed for LA Galaxy it felt like a watershed moment for soccer in the United States.

Here was a man who had dedicated his life to one club in the Premier League, a player in the mould of Ryan Giggs or Paolo Maldini, choosing the MLS as the only place he would ply his trade away from his Liverpool heartland.

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