For many it would seem like a dream come true. Two beautiful women, correction, smoking hot women, who are seemingly obsessed with the latest technology, sci-fi and online gaming and, oh, they’re in to you, really in to you. What the hell could go wrong? Well, like they say, if something’s too good to be true, it probably is. From Maxthon, who makes, in their own words, “the best browser you’ve never heard of” for windows, mac, android and the like, comes Hacker Girlfriend, an irreverent take on what happens when a gamer’s dream come true becomes a nightmare.
There are women. Then there are “dream women.”
It’s easy enough to snag the former with a cool approach even if you don’t have a lot invested your flirting bank of knowledge. She’s hot. She’s fun. You’re not tongue tied around her. If the flirtation leads nowhere, there’s always someone else to chat up.
Confidence with this kind of woman will get you pretty far – your indifference releases her anxieties and allows you to project a sense of cool.
The second kind of woman – the “dream woman” – presents a greater challenge. She’s self-composed, beautiful and elusive. She stops you in your tracks. She turns your normally savvy barstool eloquence into drivel. She haunts your thoughts. You spend hours overanalyzing every interaction, every stutter you stammered and every sideways glance she shot your way.
It’s possible to spend an entire lifetime hanging out with women of the first variety. They provide ease, fun, and confidence. Feel free to ignore your attraction to the woman of your dreams. Stifle it with a steady diet of party girls and quick flings and relationships that never quite catch.
But you’re not the kind of guy to leave what you want on the table.
Man-up, grow a pair, and land that lady already.
How Can I Get Her?
Focus on her imperfections. She does have some. Take note. Instead of focusing on all the impossibly perfect and alluring qualities that seduce you into a cold sweat—the Bardot hair, the Meghan Fox mouth, the Marion Ravenwood moxy–find the parts of her personality that don’t shine. Dig up the flaws. Find the things that make her human.
Maybe she has a charming facial tic or overuses the word “substantial” too often. Maybe she curses like a sailor, or wears unattractive printed pants. Any time you start to place her up on an unobtainable pedestal, laser in on those imperfections. Reminding yourself of her flaws helps keep her real and approachable.
Change Your Cognitive Thoughts
Cognitive science is the science of how humans think. If your woman is as superb as you think, she’s probably used to other dudes falling all over themselves around her.
View her as an equal. By making her approachable in your mind, you’ll fine tune your approach. She’ll appreciate the levelheadedness and honesty that you offer by considering her a peer rather than a princess.
What About A Date?
So your steady hand gets you in the door for a date. Now is not the time to apply the same sloppy methods you use on your normal dates. Play the long game with this one. Keep things cool and casual. Build rapport. Find a suitable credit card for an extra line of credit to afford a memorable first date. You don’t need to find a string quartet, a midnight flight to Paris or a blank check to Tiffany’s – trying too hard mashes the brakes on your pursuit quickly.
Instead, take her out to do something you have genuine passion about using your new credit card. Passion and enthusiasm play sexy to this kind of woman. While an opulent first date might flatter her ego, allowing her to see the things you value is much more attractive. If you’re a sports fan, take her to a ballgame. If you love old movies take her to see a Kurosawa film. While she might not trashtalk the pitcher, or love movies with subtitles, allow your enthusiasm for whatever to carry the date. Educate her about your passion. If it turns out you have the same things in common: perfect. If not: it’s okay. Women love men who are interested in life.
Show her your interest, then ask her to share hers on your next date. Enjoy what she shows you, be it something amazing like an architecture exhibition, disappointing like a Justin Bieber concert, or boring like financial planning. Take the opportunity to learn about her.
I Got Her!
By building this rapport you will have demystified your dream girl. Soon enough you’ll be sharing bedhead and scrambled eggs on the weekends instead of tension filled chats at the bar. Even dream women aren’t mysterious or unobtainable, you just have to be willing to wake up.
This may sound like a ridiculous question, but we can all acknowledge that relationships can be very complicated things. So here’s some food for thought in the form of a graphic courtesy of SexToy.com, a site you might want to check out to enhance your sexy time with your partner to make this question a moot issue.
“Dating isn’t easy,” is the understatement of the year. Women are complicated creatures and no two are the same. So, how can you impress her without intimidating her? How do you win her over so she agrees to that second or third date and then a relationship? These tips are sure-fire ways to convince her you’re the gentleman she’s been waiting for. Win her over by incorporating these surefire dating moves.
1. Appreciate Her
All women are different, but humans fundamentally hope to be appreciated by the people they care about. Admit it, you like your ego stroked once in a while too. So, don’t leave out appreciation. Say, “thank you,” when she offers to pick up a check. Be decent and listen when she speaks. If she shares something personal, thank her for that too. Remember that appreciation can be shown non-verbally too.
2. Do The Things She Likes
Especially when newly dating, you’ve got to treat her to the stuff she likes. Maybe you’ll find some new hobbies along the way. If she loves ice skating, take her to the rink. Let her teach you how. If she’s fond of Italian food, make a reservation at an Italian restaurant. This ties in with the first tip, because doing what she likes shows her you appreciate her.
3. Be Romantic
Spontaneity is the key to romance. Don’t be afraid to surprise her. Blindfold her, put her in a car, and drive her someplace she doesn’t expect. These spontaneous gestures show her you’re different than most guys. It’s also a good idea to brush up on your cooking skills, because many women express they love a man who can cook. If you’re terrible in the kitchen, why not take a cooking class with her?
4. Little Gifts Mean a Lot
Flowers make a great first impression. Don’t go for the sagging ones at the front of the supermarket. Make the extra effort and visit a florist. To really make this move work, ask her what her favorite flowers are before the big date. Next time get her a small box of a candy she likes and don’t forget these little gestures work both ways. Chances are she’ll start treating you to the things you like too.
5. Be Yourself
Don’t lie to her. Don’t try to run game on her, because the truth will eventually come out and you’ll end up breaking her heart. If she’s truly special to you, be honest about who you are. If you’re a sports fanatic and her last boyfriend spent hours on the couch watching hockey, let her know you don’t mind spending a Sunday watching the big game, but you’re not her ex either. Highlight your positive attributes before your negative ones. If she’s the right girl for you, she’ll accept you for who you are.
6. Don’t Rush Her
Finally, if she isn’t ready to hop into bed with you, take this as a sign of her class and don’t rush her. Your hormones may be racing every time you see her in a new outfit, but she has to be careful. Chances are she’s protecting herself for a reason. Show her that you’re willing to wait for her. Be patient, but don’t be afraid to let her know you’re ready whenever she is. If you can handle all of these tips, then you’re ready to sweep her off her feet.
Last week we were invited by Toyota to Breckenridge, Colorado to test drive their 4-wheel drive vehicles over snow and ice covered trails, and to spend some time on the slopes with US Olympic snowboarder, X-Games sliver medalist and Team Toyota competitor, Elena Hight.
Sure she was the first woman to land a 900 in competition (doing it at a ridiculously young 13 years old) and is the first snowboarder ever, male or female, to land a double backside alley-oop rodeo in Superpipe competition, but the 23-year-old is also a hottie. So besides learning how to shred the mountain, we wanted to know what it takes to date an Olympian.
Here’s what Elena had to say about being manly, whether her success intimidates guys, and the worst line she ever heard:
1. What qualities do you look for in a guy? And be specific. If you like a guy who can deal with being second place to boarding, who has enough self-confidence to be okay with that, or an Alpha guy who will take control, or a guy who will treat you like a queen, say so.
Elena Hight: I don’t necessarily have a “type” of guy that I look for. I think that the most important qualities are a good sense of humor, intelligence, a passion for life, and someone who is comfortable and confident in their own skin.
2. How important is it to you that a guy be into snowboarding or skiing? Or surfing. Or is it better that he be into something totally different that he can introduce you to? And how important is it that he be fit and active?
EH: I definitely look for a guy who is active and into sports. I love to play outdoors, so anyone who is into some type of athletic sport is good for me. They don’t necessarily have to be the best snowboarder, but they have to be able to at least hang!
3. Do you find that guys are intimidated by your success? Does it make it harder or easier to meet guys when you’re an Olympic athlete? Does the constant travel help or hurt?
EH: Traveling is great to meet new guys or people in general, however not great to keep in contact with those people. But it is really fun to be able to hang out and get to know all sorts of different guys with different backgrounds, which is nice because it’s easy to get stuck just knowing the same guys in the snowboard industry.
I am not sure that guys are necessarily intimidated by my success, but if they are, then they probably aren’t the guy for me.
4. What do you think makes a guy “manly”? Is it having no fear facing the toughest mountain runs? Knowing how to fix a car or build a deck? Protecting you from harm? Not being afraid to cry?
EH: Because I grew up in the mountains, I was constantly surrounded by manly mountain men. To me, being manly is being able to take care of others. Whether it is fixing a car or bike or snowmobile, building a fire, shoveling the driveway, or building a tent, taking charge of a situation is manly.
5. What’s the worst line any guy has ever tried to use? The absolute dumbest thing a guy ever said or did? What was your reaction?
EH: Maybe, “Can I have your phone number because I lost mine?” That is just so lame!
And what was the sweetest/funniest/best line or thing a guy ever did to try to meet you? And did it work?
EH: Flowers are the way to a girl’s heart, and it will work every time.
Eric Rogell is the author of The Art of War for Dating and the is founder of The Casanova Code, a program where he teaches sales teams, corporate executives, and marketers how to achieve unrivaled business success by using the wickedly effective secrets of seduction. You can follow him on Twitter @ericrogell.
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