Ever since I saw the first Old Spice “Mom Song” video, I have been praying to my non-denominational Spray God every night, asking (begging) that one of the smell technicians at Old Spice reach out to me for a product review of their new Re-Fresh Body Spray. In the meantime, I used an old bottle of Fiji shower gel to feel like I was part of the movement, to show I was “down,” i.e. the way gang members have to “do dirt” to be accepted into a particular gang or sect. And it paid off.
Old Spice reached out, but just like in gang life, they wanted something from me. Even though I killed that drifter (needlessly, as it turned out) to peg my “real-a-meter” into the red, what they really needed from me was to recruit more members who cover their members in body spray. After all, 67% of guys who use body spray aren’t using it correctly.
I blame AXE for the cavalier spray techniques that have been developed, because after those ads, you thought the only way to apply body spray was via Spray Cloud. I seriously didn’t think “too much” existed in the body spray vernacular.
If AXE isn’t to blame, perhaps it is the lesser known GED equivalent, Bod and the famous song/tagline conveyed via sex drenched female voice, “Hot bod/I want your bod.” And who could forget that dude’s ripped abdominals? Here, check ’em out:
Oh my Bod, that’s terrible.
Whoever you want to blame, it doesn’t change the fact that an Overspraying Epidemic exists thanks to the lack of proper training regarding spray techniques and men’s body sprays.
If February is known for anything, it’s the barrage of romantic films released in conjunction with Valentine’s Day. And in keeping with tradition, there are several to choose from this year. But while past Februarys haven’t been very promising from a guy’s point of view, there’s plenty to look forward to in the 2014 edition, with no less than four action movies (including a remake of an ‘80s cult classic) and the latest from George Clooney and an animated film that’s just as much for adults as it is for kids.
“THE LEGO MOVIE”
Who: Chris Pratt, Elizabeth Banks, Will Ferrell, Will Arnett and Morgan Freeman What: An ordinary LEGO minifigure, mistakenly thought to be the MasterBuilder, is recruited to join a quest to stop an evil LEGO tyrant from gluing the universe together. When: February 7th Why: It’s not very often that I get excited about an animated film, but as a closeted LEGO fanatic, “The LEGO Movie” is one of my most anticipated releases of the year. The fact that it’s taken this long to make a film based on the hugely popular toy brand is shocking, not only because it’s a dream project from a marketing standpoint, but because the very nature of LEGOs provides an almost endless supply of creative possibilities. This could have easily been ruined in the hands of someone else, but based on the materials released so far, it appears that directors Phil Lord and Christopher Miller (“Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs,” “21 Jump Street”) have struck the perfect chord in making a kid-friendly movie that adults can enjoy as well.
“THE MONUMENTS MEN”
Who: George Clooney, Matt Damon, Cate Blanchett, John Goodman and Bill Murray What: An unlikely World War II platoon is tasked with rescuing art masterpieces from Nazi thieves and returning them to their owners. When: February 7th Why: On paper, “The Monuments Men” has Oscar bait written all over it. In addition to being based on a true story (set during World War II, no less), the film features some of the best acting talent in the business and was also co-written and directed by star George Clooney. So why the decision to push the movie back from its original holiday release to this February? No one knows for sure, but considering the competition that it would have been up against, it was probably the right move. After all, while “The Monuments Men” certainly has the makings of a crowd-pleaser (the two-second sales pitch is “‘Ocean’s Eleven’ meets ‘Inglourious Basterds’”), it doesn’t really seem like awards material. Still, with that cast, you never know. It could be great or it could be another “The Good German.”
“VAMPIRE ACADEMY”
Who: Zoey Deutch, Lucy Fry, Danila Kozlovsky, Sarah Hyland and Olga Kurylenko What: 17-year-old half-human/vampire Rose Hathaway is dragged back to her boarding school to protect a race of peaceful vampires from the bloodthirsty Strigoi. When: February 7th Why: If “Vampire Academy” comes across as just another young adult book series turned into a film, it’s because it is – a sort of supernatural mashup of “Twilight,” “The Hunger Games” and “Divergent.” But while the Richelle Mead novel on which it’s based sounds about as fun as a trip to the dentist’s office, the movie version looks a lot more enjoyable thanks to the involvement of sibling duo Mark and Daniel Waters. The former directed the hilarious 2004 comedy “Mean Girls,” while the latter wrote the screenplay for the precursor to that film, “Heathers.” And if the trailer is anything to go by, “Vampire Academy” strikes a very similar tone, albeit with the added benefit of some action. For every successful YA book adaptation, however, there are five failures, so history certainly isn’t on its side.
Philip Seymour Hoffman was found dead in his New York apartment today. Early reports suggest his death was the result of a drug overdose.
This is sad news for his family, friends and anyone who appreciated his talent as an actor. He was among the best in the business. Some of the roles that jump out include his appearances in “The Talented Mr. Ripley” and “Boogie Nights.” Just consider for a moment how he created totally unique characters in those films. Of course he’ll be remembered for his Oscar-winning performance in “Capote.”
Super Bowl Sunday is finally here, so we can finally get to the game as opposed to the endless talk out there on the web and all the cable channels. The game has been analyzed from every possible angle, and while opinions vary greatly on who will win, many expect this to be a close game and a classic Super Bowl. You can be sure that bets are flowing into the sportsbooks in Las Vegas and betting enthusiasts all over the world are researching various bets, including the famous Super Bowl prop bets and a list of free bet offers.
The most interesting angle here involves Peyton Manning versus the Seattle defense. We’ve seen so many examples of high-powered offenses getting stuffed in the Super Bowl, with notable examples being Jim Kelly’s Buffalo Bills who seemed unstoppable untile they ran into the New York Giants defense and an offense that ground out the clock. We also saw a diffeent Giants defense stuff Tom Brady when he had some of his best offenses. Even though they won their Super Bowl, the “Greatest Show on Turf” Rams were definitely slowed down by the Titans, and then they ended up losing to the Patriots.
We’ve also seen plenty of offensive explosions, particularly in the 1980s when Joe Montana was racking up big numbers in the Super Bowls. But he faced some pretty weak defenses in those games.
So the big offense versus tough defense storyline is front and center here, and it’s magnified due to the involvement of Peyton Manning. Manning has gotten some grief for mediocre playoff and Super Bowl performances, and now he has another chance to enhance his legacy with this matchup. The important aspect of Manning’s game is that he’s an excellent tactician, so he won’t be afraid to use the running game if necessary to keep Seattle off balance, unlike Jim Kelly who seemed determined to win the game with his arm and then paid the price. On the other hand, we’ve seen Manning get frustrated by the great Patriot defenses in the past. Can that happen here?
Which then brings us to his legacy. If Manning loses, there will be those who hold that against him. That’s just the way these things go. He is one of the greatest QBs ever already. The question is how many people try to argue he belongs at the top of that list. If he wins today, he will be the only quarterback to win Super Bowls with more than one team, and that will certainly add to his legacy.
So be prepared to have this topic discussed endlessly after the game.
