The Science of Flirting: What You Need to Know


In terms of dating, flirting is what happens between two people from the moment you meet until you first have sex. And if you want to bring that intimate moment a little closer, you should master the art of flirting.

For most guys, the hardest part is to approach a woman and strike up a conversation with her, and this is where flirting can save the situation.

Basically, there are six reasons for flirting:

Sex. Obviously, people flirt expecting to seduce their interlocutor.

Curiosity. People flirt to test the waters and measure the probability of a romantic relationship with a particular person.

Romantic intentions. If you want to get out of the friend zone and let a woman know about your true feelings, flirting is a good tool.

Selfishness. Some people flirt only to come across as great seducers and assert themselves in their own eyes.

Manipulation. Some men and women resort to flirting when they want to get something from the other person.

Entertainment. For some people, flirting is a kind of game or sport. It has nothing to do with feelings or sexual interest.

What do men and women think is the purpose of flirting? Most men think the main driving force is a sexual interest while women believe men flirt with the purpose of starting a relationship.

Flirting Evokes Attachment

Probably, the most successful way of flirting is asking your partner different questions, starting with some general inquiries and gradually advancing to more personal ones. When a woman answers those questions, she feels that you’re interested in her and it creates a certain kind of bond between you. She immediately views you as a more attractive person.

Men Overestimate Flirting

According to a number of studies and experiments, men tend to take a flirting woman the wrong way, usually believing she is sexually interested in them. As for women, they tend to underestimate the true intentions of a flirting man.

Men and Women React to Flirting Differently

Canadian psychologists conducted the following experiment. Men, who were dating someone at that moment, were introduced to an attractive woman who started to flirt with them. After that, men were asked whether they would forgive their woman if they found out they were flirting with other men. The prevailing majority of the participants said no.

Women were put to the same test. After flirting with a handsome stranger, they were asked whether they would forgive their partners should they find out their man was making advances on other women, and most of the surveyed women said yes.

Available Women Seem More Attractive

Men usually wait for a particular sign from a woman to make sure she’s available and they can approach her. If a woman laughs, looks intently at you and adjusts her hair, she’s trying to communicate that she is free and wouldn’t mind your initiative. Women who behave indifferently towards men are seen less attractive by the opposite sex.

Eye Contact Has a Great Power

If you want to be successful at flirting, learn to look women in the eyes. Eye contact is a powerful flirting tool and it really works. According to the results of one experiment, strangers felt drawn to each other after two minutes of looking each other in the eyes. Those who stared at the hands of one another didn’t feel a connection.

Touching is Essential

When you approach a woman, find an excuse to touch her accidentally. This subtle physical contact has a powerful effect; it creates a slight version of chemistry. Your perfume can help you flirt with women too. The woman you’re approaching will smell your scent even before you start a conversation with her. It will give her a certain impression of you. And if you don’t disappoint her with your opening phrase, the trick is done.

The article is provided by the relationship experts from, an online dating site where you can meet and start dating Russian girls.