Kobalt 40V Max Outdoor Power Equipment introduces Bullz-Eye to manhood!
When I was a kid, I used to think the old guys who took care of their yards were losers. While I was zooming around the neighborhood smoking bowls in my car listening to Bone Thugs-n-Harmony, I thought it was pathetic how homeowners genuinely took pride in their lawns. Surely there was more to life than a new mower, hedge trimmer or edger, I surmised.
But now that I’m in my 30s and have become one of those losers, I’m here to tell you that there isn’t more to life than that.
In fact, it feels awesome to manicure your lawn, tend your garden, and then blow the clippings off of your driveway with a leaf blower upon completion. It makes the iced tea I enjoy in my folding lawn chair post-yardwork taste that much more crisp, the AM talk radio that bellows out of my open garage that much more insightful, and the episodes of “Wheel of Fortune” that I have on DVR for post-lawn enjoyment that much more stirring.
But do you know what does suck about lawn maintenance? Inadequate, cumbersome tools.
I’m not a scientist and the ever-tender 40:1 gas to oil ratio on certain power tools intimidates me. Refilling the fly wheel on a trimmer or edger? Uh, how about I just not use it instead? Mower won’t start after 50-some pulls? I’ll do it tomorrow. As a result, my lawn looked like my bathroom in college; a loose “conflaguration” of unfulfilled good intentions, drowning in questionable, unnamed chunks and fluids.
What if outdoor power equipment (OPE) tools were easy to use? What if they were actually enjoyable? What if when you were done, you felt good about yourself and your yard?
The engineers at Kobalt have not only delivered a ground-breaking collection of OPEs, but they’ve done it with empathy in mind.
At their super-secret space bunker facility in North Carolina, Kobalt engineers have tirelessly simulated the plight of the average homeowner in an isolated, controlled environment straight out of the Hunger Games. Unless the design and function of these tools was done to the Kobalt standard, they weren’t allowed to see their families, or use the bathroom. Some were simply killed with the same tools they had a hand in creating.
The entire 40-volt OPE collection was made with the user in mind.
Posted in: Gadgets, Lifestyle, Stuff to Buy
Tags: Jimmie Johnson, Kobalt, Kobalt 40V Max 19-in Mower, Kobalt 40V Max 20-in Mower, Kobalt 40V Max Blower, Kobalt 40V Max Chainsaw, Kobalt 40V Max Hedge Trimmer, Kobalt 40V Max OPE, Kobalt 40V Max Outdoor Power Equipment, Kobalt 40V Max Pole Saw, Kobalt 40V Max String Trimmer/Edger, Kobalt Tools, Lowe's, Lowe's Kobalt, Men's Outdoor Power Equipment, Men's Power Tools, NASCAR