When it was announced that Jon Favreau would not return as director of the third “Iron Man” film, the producers surely fielded offers from every name director in town. So how did Shane Black land this gig, again? The guy hasn’t written or directed a feature film since 2005′s “Kiss Kiss Bang Bang,” and yet here he is, doing that Shane Black thing once again, only this time with superheroes, while trying his best to streamline his R-rated ways for a PG-13 audience. As it turns out, “Iron Man 3″ works, but just barely, and it’s more in spite of Black’s influence than because of it. At the beginning of the second act, Black begins to get in his own way, and for anyone familiar with his work, it’s not long before a strong case of deja vu sets in. He even set the movie during the holiday season, just like “Lethal Weapon.” And “The Long Kiss Goodnight.”

Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) is not handling the events that took place in “The Avengers” well. He can’t sleep, he’s experiencing panic attacks, and he’s neglecting his girlfriend Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow). The last thing he needs is a crisis, so of course he receives two, in the form of a think tank genius named Aldrich Killian (Guy Pearce) who’s trying to woo Pepper into funding some groundbreaking genetic research, and a stone-cold terrorist named The Mandarin (Ben Kingsley) who has launched a series of unusual bombings across the country. Tony dares the Mandarin to take him on; the Mandarin responds by destroying his house. Tony Stark, one of the richest and most famous men in the world, is at rock bottom.

Taking privilege away from those who have it, and forcing them to use their wits in order to survive: it’s a fun story device, but doing it with Tony Stark is unfair to the story device. He’s too damn smart and capable to be down for more than a few seconds, and any attempt to weaken him turns out to be in vain in a very short period of time. The one thing about the story that Black nails – and it’s a big one – is the execution of the Mandarin. In the comics, the Mandarin derives his power from 10 ancient rings powered by alien technology. That isn’t going to fly in the movie universe (it would feel like cheating), and Black comes up with a rather clever way of grounding the Mandarin while maintaining his deadliness, paving the way for a showstopping performance by Kingsley. Black also gives Paltrow the long-overdue opportunity to be something other than a damsel in distress, though at the same time, he uses her as bait for a good chunk of the third act.

Indeed, that third act will serve as the barometer for how people feel about the movie overall. For those unfamiliar with Black’s work, it will probably be a non-event. It’s action-packed and entertaining and fun. For the rest, it will feel dated and silly. When Downey and Don Cheadle sneak up on the Mandarin in the movie’s big finish, it’s hard not to think of Mel Gibson and Danny Glover. People dodge ridiculously large fireballs, and Downey spends time in a dungeon in a scene that looks like a mirror image of the one from “Lethal Weapon,” though without the torture (we’re assuming the torture wasn’t in the original script, but Gibson insisted upon it). When one takes the story and thinks of it in conjunction with the bookend narration and the obligatory teaser shot at the end of the credits, it all makes sense, but in a cynical way. It reeks of hand wringing, that they manicured the script for the sole purpose of paving the way for the launch of another “Avengers” franchise, knowing that it would weaken this film, but that’s all right, because this movie will make money regardless. That’s pretty damn cynical.

“Iron Man 3″ is a movie in conflict. Marvel obviously wants these movies to be as good as they can be, but there is also the “Avengers” big picture to consider at this point. Each of these films is designed to set up another film outside of its universe, and so far they have done very well with that, but they seem to have forgotten that what started this incredible wave of momentum that Marvel is enjoying right now is the fact that the first “Iron Man” kicked ass, and it did so by putting itself ahead of the Avengers as a whole. Every movie since then – “The Avengers” excepted, mostly – has played it much safer. Some have been very good, others less so, but all of them have been about the greater good. Tony Stark doesn’t give a shit about the greater good, so it’s painful to see an “Iron Man” movie toe the line.

Bullz-Eye: First off, let me just tell you what a pleasure it is to talk to you. I’ve been a fan for many years.

Chris Elliott: Oh, well, thank you. I just don’t hear that enough. [Laughs.]

BE: In my case, it’s no exaggeration: when I was in high school, I sent off for tickets for “Late Night with David Letterman.” Granted, I had graduated by the time I actually got them, but, hey, at least I got them.

CE: Oh, my gosh. That’s pretty funny. So did you actually wait four years for tickets?

BE: No, but it was more than a year: I sent them off during my senior year, and it was well after graduation when they finally arrived.

CE: Wow, that’s pretty amazing. But it proves that you were a hardcore fan. Do you remember who was on the show when you went?

BE: Absolutely: it was Jane Pauley and Bruno Kirby. I also remember that they did Shoe Removal Races that night, with a podiatrist squaring off against a shoe salesman.

CE: Ah, yes, that was an excellent episode. [Laughs.]

BE: You were actually just on Letterman’s show a few nights ago. It sounded like you may have taken a bit of flour into your lungs.

CE: [Laughs.] I started to smell like cookies after I was under the lights for a little while. But I thought it came off all right. It’s always fun to go back there, and I hate coming back on there as myself in any form. This interview is okay because I can’t see you. [Laughs.] But I don’t like coming on and just talking as myself, so I always come on with something.

BE: The “Downton Abbey” thing was great, too.

CE: Yeah, I thought that came out great.

BE: So let’s talk “Eagleheart.” One of the most surprising things about the series, at least to me, is that you don’t actually get a writing credit on the show. Not that you don’t have some input, given that you’re a consulting producer, but…

CE: I’d say these guys have my voice down. I knew that when I met with them. They were huge fans of mine, and, honestly, I didn’t want the extra work. [Laughs.] And at the same time, y’know, they changed the pilot quite a bit to suit me, and what I do – and Adam Resnick does this, also – is sort of take a pass at the scripts when they’re done with them and change a couple of jokes here and there, and if something’s not quite in my voice, I just kind of paraphrase what I would be saying, and that sort of thing. I’m sort of at the point in my career where writers that are working in the business sort of grew up knowing about me. At least the ones that are fans of mine, anyway. And they’re really capable of writing for me. It wasn’t always that case. Early on in my career, it was pretty much Adam and me just trying to establish this voice.

BE: Of course, it makes me wonder if people sometimes come to you with something utterly off the wall, saying, “Well, ‘Cabin Boy’ was so nuts that I figured you’d be into this.’

CE: Yeah, I think I get that a lot. It’s interesting: some people put anything weird in the “weird” category and think, “Oh, Chris’ll do that because it’s so weird.” But you’re right. Certain people, like yourself, get why certain things are funny-weird as opposed to just being strange. That’s a different breed. I think I do get lumped in a lot with “he’s just off the wall, he’s crazy.”

BE: On paper, “Eagleheart” would seem to be more or less just a “Walker: Texas Ranger” parody, but it’s definitely been evolving into something more.

CE: Yeah, it was sort of that when it first started. That’s what the pilot was like. It was gonna be this half-hour show…you probably already know this, Will, but it was gonna be a show within a show, like “Walker: Texas Ranger,” and then behind the scenes of that show. We shot that pilot, and then within it were also examples of what the actual show we were doing was like…and Adult Swim actually liked the fake show better than all the behind-the-scenes stuff. [Laughs.] So that’s what they picked up: the fake show.

BE: Have you been happy with the show’s evolution?

CE: I’ve been very happy. I mean, right from the start, I thought it was gonna be fun, but it really did sort of evolve into this very surreal and very comfortable place for me to work. I mean, like you said, it seems like I’m a writer on it because it’s all my kind of humor. Jason Woliner, who directs all of them, gives the shows a very film-like look to them, which makes them stand apart, and then Andrew Weinberg and Michael Koman, the writers, along with Jason, are a cut above, I think. We all came from kind of the same background to a degree. Andrew and Michael were “Conan” writers. So the sensibility was always the same.

BE: Speaking of Mr. O’Brien, I haven’t actually seen the Season 2 episodes yet, but I understand he has deigned to make a cameo.

CE: Yeah. He was really hard to get. [Laughs.] A lot of contractual obligations for that one. Basically, there was one sticking point that was really hard to get over, which was that he didn’t want to do it. But once they got through that…

BE: Bud Cort apparently turns up as well.

CE: Yes! Bud Cort, Conan O’Brien, Ben Stiller makes an appearance. It’s a star-studded cast this year.

BE: As a “Breaking Bad” fan, I’m thrilled to see that Dean Norris is going to be appearing as well.

CE: And he’s really funny. Really, really funny. And a great guy, too.

BE: How did Mickey Rooney find his way into Season One?

CE: Uh, I wasn’t in that meeting. [Laughs.] It kind of happened without my knowledge. That was an episode where they needed an actor who had a good wattle underneath his chin. An older actor, because the premise was that there were all these older people who were doing sound effects on television, and apparently the sound effects were made by the neck wattles. And Mickey Rooney…we had a lot of people come in and audition for that, and apparently Mickey Rooney had the best wattle. Apparently. [Laughs.]

BE: As an old-school Letterman fan, I could ask you about dozens of things about “Late Night,” but first and foremost has to be your Marlon Brando impression. To my mind, the banana dance is nothing short of iconic.

CE: Well, that’s nice to hear. And you’re not alone. Yeah, it was pretty popular back in the ‘80s. I think that and the Truffle Shuffle were the big dances back then. [Laughs.]

BE: Being that Brando was as eccentric as he was, did you ever actually hear from him about the impression?

CE: No, but we actually did… I think I got his phone number at one point, and I remember actually calling and getting to a maid or somebody… [Starts to laugh.] I asked to speak to him and said who I was, and the line went dead after that. So I never actually spoke with him. And then I do remember him doing an interview, I think with Connie Chung, and she asked him…not specifically about the Brando impersonation, but she asked him, “What do you think about David Letterman?” And he didn’t answer. He just made a grotesque face. That may have been a reaction to my doing him on the show. I don’t know. I like to think that it was.

BE: Is it strange to find yourself now the middle Elliott, generationally speaking, given that your daughter (Abby Elliott) is now on “Saturday Night Live”?

CE: It’s really nice, but it is odd. Anyone at 51, I think, is starting to look back a little bit with a bit of astonishment at how fast time goes, so it is odd. I think it would be odd if… Both of my daughters are in the business, and I think it would be odd if they were doing anything else. I now have a 24-year-old and a 21-year-old, but the fact that they’re actually doing what I did when I was at their age is even weirder. And it must’ve been weird for my dad, too.

BE: And how is your dad doing?

CE: He’s doing well, thanks. He just turned 89 a couple of days ago.

BE: It’s fun being able to look on YouTube and see clips of some of the “Bob & Ray” stuff.

CE: It is. I do that every now and then myself. [Laughs.] It’s amazing to me how much I have in common with my dad and our comedy, because on the surface it does not look the same at all. But especially when Bob and Ray were starting out, some of the stuff they did was pretty bizarre and off the wall, and I realize that, yeah, that’s obviously where I got it from. I was thinking the other day that…I think if I worked at a radio station when they were first starting out, I would’ve been drawn to their sense of humor right away. I would’ve tried to be on their staff. And they probably would’ve been drawn to me in some way. They would’ve made me the goofy record-puller in the studio. [Laughs.]

BE: Abby’s obviously doing very well on “SNL,” but given that you had the chance to work with your father on “Get A Life,” were you disappointed when the pilot you did with her, “You’ve Reached the Elliots,” didn’t take off?

CE: Yeah, I mean, I actually thought that was a good pilot. It’s…ever since “Get A Life,” it’s been hard for any network to sort of see me doing anything but what I did on “Get a Life.” And at the same time, they don’t want me to do what I did on “Get A Life.” [Laughs.] So that’s doubly hard for me. I mean, back then, six years ago, the idea of playing a dad but playing him like a grown-up Chris Peterson, seemed like, “Okay, this is the best of both worlds.” But ultimately I think it’s hard to imagine that guy from “Get A Life” having kids. [Laughs.]

BE: Speaking of “Get A Life,” has there been any movement on seeing it released as a complete series on DVD?

CE: It is going to be coming out. I’m not entirely sure when. I think probably in the fall…? But, yeah, it will be actually coming out…finally!

BE: Do you know who’s putting it out? Is it Shout Factory?

CE: It is Shout Factory.

BE: I knew it had to be. [Laughs.] That’s awesome. Now if we can just get “FDR: A One-Man Show” back out there…

CE: That was out there once upon a time. I think it was on tape when it came out. I don’t think it ever went to DVD at any point, unfortunately. But, of course, I continue to travel the country performing it… [Laughs.]

BE: Of course. Have you done any special features for the “Get A Life” set yet?

CE: We’re going to. I guess the end of April we’re going to go out and do those. Commentaries and that sort of thing.

BE: As you can tell, I’m a little psyched.

CE: Oh, good. No, I’m glad! I think it’s time that fans like yourself can get it. I don’t know why, really, that it’s taken so long.

BE: To touch on “Cabin Boy,” I also must tell you that I’ve got my daughter to the point where, whenever she sees a sock monkey, she asks, “Would you like to buy a monkey?” And she’s only six, so she’s clearly damaged for life.

CE: [Laughs.] Yeah, that’s one of those catchphrases that’s entered our culture, thanks to “Cabin Boy.”

BE: I also write for the Onion AV Club, and we just had a piece on there where the film was inducted into the New Cult Canon.

CE: I saw that! Yeah, that was nice to see. I’ve always said that I stand by that movie. I think Adam did a great job directing it. Every time I see it on TV, I’m amazed at how interesting it looks and how bizarre it is. At the time it came out, it was just vilified, but it seems to have grown on people.

BE: Setting aside the obvious answers of “Cabin Boy” and “Get A Life,” is there any other project you’ve worked on over the years that didn’t get the love you thought it deserved?

CE: Oh, that’s a good question. You mean something that actually was made that then was not appreciated as much?

BE: Right.

CE: Just about everything. [Laughs.] I know that sounds like a broad answer, but just about anything that’s been initiated by me or by people close to me for me…it’s not that it hasn’t been appreciated. I always feel like I’ve been very lucky, and I have a hardcore following, but I think that most of…just about everything I do is met with a certain amount of bafflement by the general public. [Laughs.] And I think that’s a good place, actually, for me to be: just slightly on the outside of the mainstream. And I’m perfectly comfortable being there.

BE: To get really obscure for a moment, I talked with Stephen Collins last year…

CE: Oh, yeah!

BE: …and we talked briefly about your work on the series “Tattinger’s.”

CE: That’s funny. Geez, that’s going way back. That was, like, my first outside television gig other than working for Dave. Yeah, he was in that, and…who else was in that? Blythe Danner! And I remember that Gwyneth Paltrow was a little kid, and she was running around on the set when we were shooting “Tattinger’s.” [Laughs.] But that was really fun. Those guys were fans of mine from what I was doing on “Letterman,” and they let me be this goofy character. I think in general that’s where I’ve fit in the best: when I’m the odd next-door neighbor or the odd brother or something like that. “Get A Life,” actually, was always kind of…the concept of that show, essentially, was that it was built around a bizarre secondary character from any other normal, more or less mainstream sitcom. In the real world, that character would’ve been on, like, the old “Newhart” show or something. With our show, we followed him home and saw him living with his parents.

BE: I know we’re up against the wall, but, lastly, I just wanted to touch on your voice work over the years. You said in an AV Club interview a few years ago that you were never fond of the work you did on “Dilbert,” but is there anything you’ve done that you’ve been particularly proud of?

CE: Um…I’ve never liked my voice. [Laughs.] Unlike my dad, who has this beautiful radio voice, I’ve always thought that I had a whiny, adenoidal voice, and it’s really hard for me to listen to it on its own. So I don’t enjoy doing voiceover-type stuff. Also, I don’t think I’m any good at it. I don’t think that’s where my expertise lies…if I’m even an expert at anything. [Laughs.]

BE: Well, you’ve doing very well with “Eagleheart.”

CE: Well, thanks. Again, this is my comfort zone: playing a complete moron in a really crazy, violent show. [Laughs.] It’s what I was born to do.

Abraham Simpson summed up our relationship with music better than anyone. We used to be ‘with it,’ but then they changed what ‘it’ was. Now what we’re ‘with’ isn’t ‘it,’ and what’s ‘it’ seems weird and scary to us. That description also applies to some of the kids who are neck-deep in contemporary pop, since there are so many different options, it’s easier than ever to be your own musical island.

This, however, makes it difficult to throw a party celebrating the “best” music of the past year, since it really only covers the best of the popular music, and due to rigid programming, most popular music isn’t terribly good. This inspired us to watch the Grammy Awards for the first time in ages, just to see what we could glean from how the machine currently operates. What we discovered might surprise you. Could it be that the industry is lying about their financial woes?

The music industry is doing awesome

When the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences throws its annual Hooray For Us party – you know, the one that nets roughly four times as many viewers as last night’s broadcast – it’s held in a venue like the Kodiak Theater, which seats just over 3,400 people. Last night’s Grammy Awards were held in the Staples Center, which seats 20,000. If you equate the size of the venue for your party to the health of your company, that means that the music industry is making six times as much money as the movie industry. So don’t listen to their pitiful cries of how much money they’re losing to illegal downloads, lack of interest, etc. If they were really that despondent, they wouldn’t blow that much money on one party…would they? After all, that would just be foolish and irresponsible.

And while we’re on the subject of fiscal responsibility, we have a suggestion for them…

The music business would turn profitable tomorrow if they got rid of backup dancers

If you include Muse’s uprisers, there were nearly 80 people who served as dancers, or fire breathers, or as something other than a musician or a singer, in the various performances from last night’s show. That can’t be cheap, and really, what do they add? If anything, they’re a telltale sign that said performer doesn’t really have much to offer in a live setting. We have an idea that will save them millions: The labels should adopt a policy similar to the one that the airline industry uses to fleece its customers, and bill their artists for using dancers. And not even in a ‘we’ll take it out of your royalties’ way; actually make the artists pay cash out of their pockets for the dancers. Boom, they disappear just like that. Tours get cheaper, everyone makes more money. Just a thought.

Justin Bieber might be the real deal

For a kid who’s about to turn 17, Justin Bieber is remarkably well composed. He can sing, of that there is no doubt, but last night he showed just how comfortable he was as a performer while maintaining some modesty at the same time. The last time we saw someone cover so much ground, it was Justin Timberlake, and we all saw how he turned out. Someone’s gotta give that kid a new haircut, though. He looks like a lesbian.

Even the Recording Academy knows that no one cares who wins these awards

In three and a half hours, they gave away 11 Grammys, or roughly one every 19 minutes. The rest were done in advance. Sorry, Black Keys, but you won’t have the chance to thank your wives and managers for their support on air. They’ll have to settle for a phone call or a text message, like a sucker. Geez, even the sound editors for movies get to thank their wives on national television.

If Train wins a Grammy, and nobody cares, did they still win?

If you wear sunglasses indoors, and you’re not Jack Nicholson, you just look like a douche

Granted, we knew this already, but man, were there a lot of Corey Harts in attendance last night. Our quick list of the guilty: Donnie Wahlberg, Lenny Kravitz, Justin Bieber, Lady Gaga, will.i.am, Usher, LL Cool J, and Bruno Mars. Unless you’re high, take the damn glasses off.

Katy Perry doesn’t use Auto-Tune live

That might sound like an insult, but to be honest, it was kind of refreshing to see Perry, um, let it all hang out, especially after the blockbuster tribute to Aretha Franklin that opened the show (more on that later). Watching her last night was like watching the internal struggle of a pop star who loves being ogled but craves respect. Don’t be surprised if her next record is decidedly more serious.

Why doesn’t anybody take me seriously?

Arcade Fire knew they were going to win Album of the Year

How else were they so prepared to jump back on stage and play another song? Because they knew they’d have to. The producers will probably argue that they asked all Album of the Year nominees to be prepared to perform another number, but Jesus, their instruments were already up there. Also, did you notice that they didn’t give out a single Grammy to someone who wasn’t in attendance? Not a single ‘such and such artist wasn’t able to be here tonight, so we accept this on their behalf’ speech. Did anyone show up not knowing whether they were going to win or lose? We’re betting against it.

Muppets make everything better

Usher may have had the busiest performance, but the best performance of the evening, bar none, was Cee Lo Green dueting with Gwyneth Paltrow – side note to Paltrow: you’re beautiful, but the low-cut dress makes you look like you’re trying too hard, and lose the heels – performing the brilliantly titled “The Song Otherwise Known as ‘Forget You’” with a bunch of muppets. THAT’S how you put on a TV performance, people.

Photo credit: Kevin Winter, Getty

Christina Aguilera is physically incapable of just singing the damn song

If you put her in a “Saw”-type device, where she inched closer and closer to death for every melisma-drenched vocal run she sang, she’d be the quickest death in the series’ history. There’s no question that she has pipes, and that tribute to Aretha Franklin was superb (and wow, check out Jennifer Hudson), but enough with the histrionics, already. We get it, you can sing. Now just sing the fucking song, instead of singing around it.

Songwriting is greatly undervalued in today’s musical climate

While we’re disappointed that “Fuck You” didn’t win Record of the Year or Song of the Year, we’ll grant the academy that Lady Antebellum’s “Need You Now” is a damn good tune. Several of the other winners, however, seemed to have won because of the overall package, not the song they’re singing. Miranda Lambert’s “The House That Built Me” and “Nothin’ on You,” B.o.B.’s duet with Bruno Mars, are both grossly underwritten, with an air of calculation that makes our nostrils flare. The Janelle Monae song was a little better – and while it’s great to see Motown make a comeback in the pop realm, it should have happened two years ago when Raphael Saadiq released The Way I See It – but even it had more spirit than substance. And don’t get us started on that goddamn Train song.

Laugh all you want at Babs performing “Evergreen” and showing that she’s lost some power, but “Evergreen” is a song. People will remember that one 30 years from now. No one, however, will remember “Nothin’ on You.”

Some other observations:

John Mayer wants to be Johnny Depp
Mick Jagger hasn’t eaten in 20 years
Ricky Martin is color blind. Or possibly just blind
Bob Dylan would sound better if Tom Waits sang on his behalf. Think about that one for a second. Yes, it’s that bad.