It’s been 15 years since “Desperado” and half as long since “Once Upon a Time in Mexico” but it looks like Robert Rodriguez was finally ready to give us a film worthy of his glorious, violent legacy. “Machete” tells the tale of a federal agent, betrayed by his own organization, robbed of his family, and on a rampage of revenge that no one can stop. It’s exactly the kind of explosive plot you expect from Rodriguez, and he’s done us one better – he filled the movie with incredible women.

Just look at the pure heat in this movie: Jessica Alba, Michelle Rodriguez, Lindsay Lohan, Cheryl Chin. Even the minor appearances are smoking. Rodriguez got his nieces, Elise and Electra Avellan to play a pair of nurses. I’d love to hear how he explained that one to mom and dad. It had to be a little strange to cast your two ridiculously hot nieces in one of the sexiest roles known to man.

It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a truly hot Jessica Alba on screen, and nothing is hotter than Alba stripped down to her underwear and soaking wet as we saw in the trailer (okay, maybe one thing is hotter, but we just aren’t that kind of site). Michelle Rodriguez made a name for herself on “Lost” and when you see her in “Machete” you’ll understand why. Can a woman wearing a leather shotgun-holster on her thigh outsexy Alba? If anyone can do it, it’s definitely going to be Michelle Rodriguez in this movie.

So sit back, relax, and take a little time out of your evening to appreciate the girls of “Machete.” And when you’re done, be sure hit your local theater. The movie released around the country on September 3rd.