Hands up: who was mad as fuck when the final clock ticked…and you actually heard the clock tick? Big Dick Heller is up there with David Palmer, Old Yeller, and Big Balls Bill Buchanan in terms of the most faithful and lovable characters in the show’s history. Dude gets blown to pieces on “the pitch” in Wembley Stadium – where, curiously, the lights were on, suggesting the staff were in on the hit – and he doesn’t merit a silent clock tick? Fuck, that.
I might be amenable to attributing this to a change of direction, and the show trying to stay fresh by handing the directorial reins to someone young and possibly unfamiliar with the show’s history. But no, tonight’s episode was directed by Jon Cassar, who has directed 65 episodes of “24,” including 12 from this season alone. Simply put, he knows better than to show such a lack of respect. Jon, you have some ‘splaining to do.
The only way the lack of a silent clock tick makes sense is if Big Dick is not actually dead. That idea doesn’t hold water, though, because David Palmer received two silent clock ticks, one when we thought he was assassinated by Mandy the bisexual assassin, and another when he was actually assassinated. If they were to even go that route here – and let’s hope they didn’t – they would err on the side of caution and lead us to believe Big Dick was dead, right? RIGHT?
”This decision is mine. I’ve lived a full live, and these are the eyes that I want you to remember.”
Big Dick’s scene with Audrey was heartbreaking for anyone who has kids of their own. He asks to see the picture of him with his wife and Audrey as a little girl, knowing this might be the last time he remembers anyone in that picture. It’s a sweet last moment, and you can see him wipe away a tear as he walks out of the room. No one truly owns Alzheimer’s Disease, which is why I like what they’re doing here. You want to root for him, because he gets to do the things that most people would like to do, but normally don’t realize until it’s far too late that it’s time to do it. It lends credence to his wish to be assassinated; it’s death on his terms, and if it can be a noble death at the same breath, it’s hard to say no, even if it violates the first rule of Terrorist Club, which is that we do not negotiate with terrorists. That’s a joke, of course – we negotiate with terrorists all the time –but it sounds good when we say it out loud, doesn’t it?
Here are the big takeaways from this episode:
Ian Al-Harazi might be more hardcore than Mommie Dearest Remember when I said that Simone would be the one to put her mother down? Yes, well, now it looks like she might be killed for not being extreme enough, because Ian is insulted when Mommie Dearest balks at showing mercy, when her word is on the line (and thank goodness that they brought that whole ‘I don’t like to kill innocents’ back into play, because that was a wide open plot hole). At this point, it appears that Ian is going to kill Mommie Dearest the next time she shows a moment of weakness (read: humanity), and yet, from our perspective, she’s doing the right thing.
There is a lesson to be learned here, namely the importance of the credibility of your name, which is something that most people don’t learn until they’re older and, at which point, it’s too late to take back the things they did.
Jordan tests well, but isn’t very smart There is an attempt made on his life, and what does he do? He calls the guy who set up the hit on him, and isn’t at all suspicious when his boss tells him to stay where he is. Sure, he killed the guy who was hired to kill him, but now he knows for a fact that the guy was hired to kill him. On the plus side, this gives me the perfect song to name next week’s episode, without even knowing what happens. Trust me, Prefab Sprout fans understand. I’ll pause while most of you say, “Who?”
And that brings us to this week’s song, who comes from the veddy, veddy British band the Candy Skins. The irony in their song is that they realized that their moment had come and gone, and still wrote a stadium anthem, and a damn catchy one at that.