Mountain Dew Kickstart Adventure Starring BMX Pros Chad DeGroot and Mark Mulville

“It’s paid the bills, flown me around the world many times,” said DeGroot. “I’ve got friends in every state, crazy sponsors. But yeah, that’s what I do.”

Both guys have met hella cool people as well, like Eminem, Russell Crowe and Juliette Lewis:

“All of Europe is crazy huge for BMX,” said Mulville about popularity overseas. “Kids are more excited there. You go to a random city in south of France and every kid knows more about you than you do. I’m going to Estonia next month and it’s the same thing. It’s crazy.”

“My record is 220 days on the road in a year,” said DeGroot about the most he’s ever traveled since turning pro. And the coolest place he’s ever been?

“Japan, no doubt. They pride themselves on service and making people happy. They truly, truly love what you do. You could take of your shoes and change your socks and they’d be like, ‘Wow he changed his socks, awesome.’ They love this stuff over there. No disrespect to other countries, but Japan was the one that really stands out.”

So after talking with the guys about the basics of “BMX Theory,” it was time to quit being such a wuss and carve some bowls!

Initially, I was riding my brake pretty hard like a complete woman. So, I needed something to break the ice, to cut the tension, to get my juices flowing. I was able to procure a can of Mountain Dew Kickstart Orange and I sucked that thing down like Jesse Pinkman at an all-night meth party. It tasted like original Mountain Dew, but with an orange flavor similar to Sunkist or another popular orange soda.

Within minutes, I could feel the effects, and it immediately paid dividends in my BMX game, which you can see here, as Mark Mulville takes my “drop-in” virginity and was surprisingly gentle about it for a man with such rough, firm hands:

To put this adventure into perspective, I entered the Orlando Skate Park with the BMX wherewithal of the average nine-year-old in terms of understanding, the average 12-year-old in terms of athletic skills, all packed into a nearly 33-year-old frame of a man. Why didn’t I get into this shit when I was 12? It would be pretty emasculating to hit up a local skate park at age 32 and get crushed by some teenagers.

Once I got to the airport, I had some time to reflect on the previous two days. But as soon as I got started in the act of reflecting, a relatively hot chick sat down across the aisle from me… and pulled out a banana.

The next four minutes were pretty awesome. Wait, what was I saying again?

What made it even more awesome was the way her friend was simultaneously enjoying a Mountain Dew; unbeknownst to her, the only reason I was there was because of Mountain Dew. It really put the whole trip into perspective.

No matter how old you are and no matter how much responsibility you have, keep it simple. There’s nothing better than riding bikes with friends, and there’s nothing as powerful as a chick with a banana.

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